Another One Bites The Dust….
I was informed early this morning about an up and coming actor named Terrell Carter being outed by his ex-boyfriend. I had no idea who he was so upon my research I discovered that he has been in several of Tyler Perry’s movies and plays including Meet The Browns, Diary Of A Mad Black Woman, Madea’s Class Reunion and others. If you Google him, you will see that he is a handsome, chocolate man. Apparently, he also is embarking on a singing career. According to his ex-boyfriend and the pictures below he is also gay. Personally, I do not have a problem with anyone being homosexual. Who cares? I do have a problem with men who try to keep it in the closet and then have romantic relationships with women publicly and privately have sex with men. You cannot have a family with a woman and then dip off for booty from a man. It is called living a lie. I realize that this is something that has been going on for years but I just don’t think that I could do that to my significant other. My heart would be too heavy.
Kissy Face
If you want to be gay then be that but don’t become involved with some unsuspecting woman to validate your manhood. I honestly do not know whether Carter has a woman as well but I do know that he references women in his music. Besides Terrell Carter I am speaking more so to the other brothers out there who have wives and girlfriends’ at home who they have unprotected sex with and then dip out to mess around with guys and have unprotected sex with them as well. If you want to have fun, get a little booty, and be free sexually that is your choice but don’t be so selfish as to involve yourself with a woman and not only lead her on but also put her at risk. Be honest with yourself and her. In the same sense it is equally wrong for a woman to not be open and honest about her sexuality with whomever she is dealing with.
Unfortunately it seems that we as a society have not yet reached a point where a Black man can be openly gay and still have a successful entertainment career. However, it is more accepted for a Black woman to be openly gay. For some reason there is this assumption that Black men aren’t gay. It is just a White men’s issue. An assumption that we all know is not true no matter how much we try to deny it. With that being said, I can on some levels understand (not agree) why he would want to keep his personal life private. He did not want to risk his career. I just hope that if he is involved with a woman, she of all people is privy to this information and he is not putting her life at risk. As a Black woman today you have to be careful. Never be afraid to ask your partner questions about their sexuality and demand honesty.
Be Real With Yourself
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The really sad part about all this is that women don’t like to acknowledge the fact that their men will ALWAYS prefer their boys to their wives…it’s just the way it is. I’m not saying take it to the extremes shown above but I wish my girl knew that I would much rather kick it with my guys than her any day of the week because it’s a much less complicated relationship to uphold and I don’t have to worry about questions like “Am I fat” or she getting her period and flipping out on me! When this happens, who do I call? My boys. I see your point about not living a lie if you’re homosexual but sometimes they want a traditional family and a little extra on the side.
I’m a little confused. The story is titled “Another One Bites the Dust…” and the caption under Mr. Carter’s pic reads “Another Handsome Black Man Gone.” [BTW, where did he go?] My initial read of the title led me to think this was to be a story about the perils of taking intimate photos. Instead, this is a story about men who engage in DL behavior … and that’s what’s confusing me.
What was the reason for using Mr. Carter as a jumping off point for a story on DL behavior? You admit in the piece that there is nothing that suggests that he engages in this type of behavior. You state that you don’teven know if he also has an intimate relationship w/ a woman but that he references women in his music. Being gay does not disqualify a man from understanding a woman’s needs and wants. Luther and Freddie Jackson never had a problem and Mark Cherry seems to have it down to a “T.”
My problem is that you conflated being a black gay man w/ DL behavior. Seems to do more damage.
After reading the comments left by a young African American woman on the Facebook Link to this article…I feel compelled to address the “obviousness” of denial that some women live in regarding Mr.Terrell Carter and his sexuality. This story was not given by Mr. Terrell himself, which speaks directly to secrecy and the warning signs of a man being on the “DOWN LOW”. How can a woman come to the defense of a man who clearly did not take advantage of the opportunity to express his sexuality before someone was angry enough to put his personal life on blast. He has marketed himself as a straight man in his music and craft. Although this has no bearing on Mr. Terrell Carter’s character as an artist, it makes me wonder why he has not come forth to be embraced by his culture both African American, and entertainment counterparts? When “Googling”, which in the times we live in, serves as an information source, the titles read in a wide array of specific words such as “OUTED”, “UNCOVERED”, and so forth. The issue is not truth, as you can obviously see in the images released, if this was not an issue within Mr. Terrell’s personal life, then it would not be anything to report or post in the media. The media cannot spin or slant this story, and if more women would take off there blinders, and pay attention to what is happening around them, then this could possibly kill the “Down Low” participation of the opposite sex which will force the term “IN CLOSET” to be the only term referenced when a man decides not to disclose his sexual preference. Also, for the mention of other artist’s such as Freddie & Luther, there music was about love and had no gender, and I do not recall that any of those artist’s mention marketed themselves or their music to be anything other than what it was….Classic. Plus it did not take a rocket scientist to figure that those artist had a preference and respected women and their privacy enough to not exploit it by hiding who they were or posing in masculine images marketed to women. So to the young lady and anyone who seems to have there blinders on….please take them off and take care of yourself…its a dog eat dog world and its that kind of attitude that will continue to plague or community, statistics will continue to rise in lieu of this crazy thing I like to call Denial.
After reading the comments left by a young African American woman on the Facebook Link and above to this article…I feel compelled to address the “obviousness” of denial that some women live in regarding Mr.Terrell Carter and his sexuality. This story was not given by Mr. Terrell himself, which speaks directly to secrecy and the warning signs of a man being on the “DOWN LOW”. How can a woman come to the defense of a man who clearly did not take advantage of the opportunity to express his sexuality before someone was angry enough to put his personal life on blast. He has marketed himself as a straight man in his music and craft. Although this has no bearing on Mr. Terrell Carter’s character as an artist, it makes me wonder why he has not come forth to be embraced by his culture both African American, and entertainment counterparts? When “Googling”, which in the times we live in, serves as an information source, the titles read in a wide array of specific words such as “OUTED”, “UNCOVERED”, and so forth. The issue is not truth, as you can obviously see in the images released, if this was not an issue within Mr. Terrell’s personal life, then it would not be anything to report or post in the media. The media cannot spin or slant this story, and if more women would take off there blinders, and pay attention to what is happening around them, then this could possibly kill the “Down Low” participation of the opposite sex which will force the term “IN CLOSET” to be the only term referenced when a man decides not to disclose his sexual preference. Also, for the mention of other artist’s such as Freddie & Luther, there music was about love and had no gender, and I do not recall that any of those artist’s mention marketed themselves or their music to be anything other than what it was….Classic. Plus it did not take a rocket scientist to figure that those artist had a preference and respected women and their privacy enough to not exploit it by hiding who they were or posing in masculine images marketed to women. So to the young lady and anyone who seems to have there blinders on….please take them off and take care of yourself…its a dog eat dog world and its that kind of attitude that will continue to plague or community, statistics will continue to rise in lieu of this crazy thing I like to call Denial.
I was wondering if he did date women, cuz that piece of information would justify him being put on blast. I don’t feel that a person’s sexual orientation is important because it’s about the art, the music, the show, the talent, the experience I get from listening or watching them.
Yea, it sucks, that such a fine, handsome, chocolate guy is not available to eligible women, or even black women. I think he likes latinos, j/k….But, i saw this movie on life time called “America”. This foster child, male, was sexually abused. I want to know what percentage of black males in foster care are sexually abused? The ratio of black males in foster care compared to the ratio of black males not in foster care? And that to the percentage of black males who are gay/bisexual compared to ones who are straight? My point is I think a lot of african american males are being sexually abused and its really messing with our race.
@ Kboogie
What “obviousness” are you speaking about? There is no denial about his sexuality. There is photographic proof that he is sexually attracted to men. My problem with the post is that the author has conflated being a gay man with gay men who engage in DL behavior. There is no evidence — which the author of the piece admits — that this man has engaged in DL behavior or that he is even invovled with women at all. So why tie him to this piece? The author’s sole inkling of any DL tendencies on his part is the fact that he sings about women in his music. Really? A stretch at best. Since when did singing a song equate to someone being on the down low? The silliest notion I’ve heard in awhile.
If a woman takes her cues about a man’s sexuality based upon his performance as artist, then I submit that she isn’t sophisticated/mature enough to date anyone. This IS NOT the secrecy and warning signs attendant in a down low relationship. He is an artist. He takes roles and makes music. He hasn’t marketed himself as anything more than someone who has the ability to inhabit roles. That’s his job — any good artist’s job — is to create the fantasy and draw you in. His entire persona is created by a team of people. He is no more a reflection of what he sings or the roles that he takes, than Beyonce is Sasha Fierce. Is he precluded from singing about romantic liasions because he’s gay? If he has a good voice, what’s the problem? Disclaimer: I haven’t listened to this guy’s music but unless he’s singing ” I’m a straight man, I only love and have sex only with women, I wrote these songs because they are my life” he’s “marketing” himself in the same manner as Luther, Freddie, and every other entertainer flying under the radar.
I could care less if some blogs claim that this guy was “outed” – that doesn’t make it so. The goal of a blog is to get page views – sensationalism and sound bites rule the day. Not necessarily the entire story. For all we know, the people that matter, his family and close friends are well aware of his sexuality. He doesn’t have a responsibility to loudly proclaim that he is gay (in his music or otherwise) anymore than a heterosexual does. And let’s be clear – there is a reason why entertainers don’t reveal that they are homosexual — they’re selling a fantasy/product that you need to believe in for the time the artist is blaring on your iPod or performing on the screen. Our society is geared to be Judeo Christian and hetero. There’s very little room for anything else.
There are no blinders here. Having lived in Atlanta and now in DC – where there is an even more serious DL problem than in Atlanta and the AIDS rate is higher than that in W. Africa – I am acutely aware of the DL problem and it’s devastating consequences and that’s why I think the author of the piece missed a real opportunity to inform her readers about what true DL behavior looks like and dispel myths. Point of fact, this guy is not a fair or accurate representation of the men who engage in this type behavior.
SwansOneG, I seriously respect your passion and drive to debate your opinion…but if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, it is a duck, he is in an intimate photo with a male, that is not the debate. What I see and confirm to be exactly what it is “DL”. A man who does not openly admit his sexuality to mislead a person whether in music/images/ or movies is the making of a DL situation. Ask yourself, despite what we know or do not know about this story, how many are truly in shock due this…seems to be an issue its the whole entertainment community & media, Headlines read, “HE HAS BEEN OUTED!!” Meaning in order to be exposed there was something hidden. As a journalist we have to state facts, and as a true journalist we also have integrity to uphold in our writings. The author of this article did just that without being biased when asked to further expand and confirm. What I am merely saying in pointing out the “OBVIOUS” is this young man did not come forth, in which the entertainment industry is largely built on is images, sounds, talent, and last time I checked the “IT” factor. Psssst the last time I did check Mr Terell Carter’s image was that of a straight man or the illusion of. I am sorry to say, but The Picture of Mr. Terrell and His lover vs his marketed image and songs wins over all opinions in this, and this by far was an excellent way to discuss an issue that is so very avoidable with honesty.
Also…there are many Facets to the DL Scene, this is just one
@ Kboogie
Um…yeah. This man is an entertainer who was outed to the public by a scorned lover. Nothing you’ve posited suggests that this guy has engaged in any behavior that the norm considers DL.
I guess I’m taken aback by the thought that in this day and age of manufactured celebs that any rational mature adult would think that the person being marketed to them is anything like that persona. In other words, when I hear a man sing a love song, I don’t automatically assume that he is heterosexual just because he croons love songs about women and is marketed as a hetero anymore than I would assume that a man who regularly dons women’s clothes in just about every movie he appears in, is a cross dresser or desires a sex change. It’s all entertainment – a facade, a fantasy not a calling card for the real person.
It’s patently unfair and inappropriate to mark this guy with the “DL” tag solely because you took the fantasy his marketing team put together to mean that he was an available heterosexual. The enetertainment industry is replete with examples of attractive gay men who were marketed in the mainstream as hetero in order to satiate the female demographic. It’s about $$$, not some nefarious DL scheme.
Until this guy starts hitting the red carpet with a “female date” or starts giving interviews talking about his desire to get married to a woman and have children, he’s not trying to deceive anyone and certainly isn’t on the “DL.”
We cannot necessarily assume that this man was on the down-low. Because he never said “I am NOT gay”. In the words of america…DUH
OMG I haven’t read the other comments but all I want to say is I first discovered this FINE ass brother a few years back. I’m surprised he hasn’t blown up yet with him being as good-looking and talented as he is. Can sing his ass off. BUT OMG WAS I SHOCKED TO SEE THIS. I would have never guessed in a million years that he was gay! And I’m mad as hell. All my fantasies about him down the drain LOL. It’s f*cked up that this came out before he had a chance to really show his talent to the masses b/c this situation has the potential to upstage anything else he tries to do. At the end of the day we can’t judge him for being gay. That’s for God to do. It’s just kinda crazy to see such a sexy chocolate brother kissing a man. He even has a song about how he likes thick women. I’m guessing he didn’t write that song LOL.