Does Forever Exist In A Relationship? Halle Berry Doesn’t Think So.
Halle Berry recently made some interesting comments concerning her relationship with her baby daddy and marriage itself. See Below courtesy of TVOne Blog:
THE SPIN:
For the millionth time, Halle Berry doesn’t want to become Mrs. Gabriel Aubry.
When asked by Britain’s You magazine if she’ll ever walk back down the aisle, Halle gave a polite “hell no.”
She said:
“I’m so not the relationship go-to girl. But I’m much clearer about what a relationship is, which is why I will never marry again. Gabriel and I have a great partnership and a lovely daughter. But I once was stupid enough to say, in a previous relationship, ‘I’m going to be with this person for ever,’ and realized, as I grew, that I don’t know if for ever is possible.
Gabriel and I don’t look at our relationship in terms of for ever, we look at it as right here today. And today means being the best people we can be, the best parents we can be. It’s wonderful, but neither one of us feels the need to attach ourselves to each other for life – because it may not be that.”
Someone’s been burned. Despite not wanting to be anyone’s bride, she hasn’t turned down the possibility of being his baby mama the second time around.
She added: “I’m certainly open to having another, so I hope so. Motherhood will always be my priority now, especially because I had a child for the first time at 41. My priority had been myself for a long, long time, but now it will always be Nahla. You think you know what love is – until you have a child and discover that unconditional mother love.”
Is it so impossible to think that in 2009 you can get married and be with someone forever? Through their life changes as well as their own individual growth. I look at my Grandparents who have been together for over fifty years and that gives me a glimmer of hope. However, I also consider the fact that they are from a different generation who had different ideologies towards marriage and the relationship between a man and woman. In today’s world where there are so many temptations it makes it easier to give up on a person and want to move on. Your man is getting on your nerves.. Go to the club and get a new one! Your girl put on some weight? Don’t fret! Get a new one! You been with your wife for over ten years and you are bored? Sounds like it is time for an upgrade! Go find yourself someone 20 years younger than you! These are circumstances that happen everyday and marriages fall apart due to them.
Does Halle have a point about not expecting to realistically be with someone forever? Is it truly not possible any more? Or is it a personal decision between a man and a woman that no matter what life throws at them they will continue to maintain their relationship. Will and Jada Smith, who I’m sure have their own set of issues such as the rumor about them participating in menage a trois, have managed to make their marriage last for over 10 years. That is a long time in Hollywood time. One of the key elements seems to be that divorce is not an option for them according to Will. Is it as simple as eliminating the choice of divorce? Or is it deeper than that? Is Halle settling by only being a baby mama? Or is it simply that Halle has given up on love?
Thoughts?
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“Love” is as flimsy a concept as “dry clean only” and because someone says that you’re SUPPOSED to do that doesn’t mean that’s the only way to do it. Monotony breeds boredom in every one of us–the question is what you will do once you get bored. Will you find another extended one night stand or will you find some way to work it out? It’s 2009 people, well past time to get hung up on something as silly (yes silly) as marriage when you should be more concerned with getting your money right. And to the men of means out there, you should keep these three things in your overnight bag: condoms, ironclad pre-nups and great lawyers.
She has given up on the notion of monogamous love, but she hasn’t given up on love. There has to be a certain ideology that you subscribe to in order to hold on to the “hope” of true love. I think Halle has just decided to embrace the reality of what “love” and “relationship” is in an over-sexed society that views love and monogamy as “old school”.
I agree with Phoenix to a certain extent. Just because you chose not to marry, does not mean that you’ve given up on love. Love can be lived, experienced, and shared in many different ways. However, marriage is viewed as the morally correct or “right” way to share love with someone. I think its good that halle knows what she wants in life and in a relationship. So many women get hurt because they dont know what they truly want, and end up getting in crappy relationships.
I myself am in a loving marriage, though it is still fresh and new, I know that problems will arise, and most likely boredom. But i agree with Will Smith, divorce is just not an option for me. I feel like as long as me and him can work things out, then our marriage and love can still grow, even in 2009.