People always label Lisa Raye McCoy as a gold digger because she has made statements that she will not date anyone that does not have a certain higher income and lifestyle. But is she a gold digger? That term is easily thrown around for any woman in which one of her requirements is that a man is able to provide for her. Especially Black women, who have been stereotyped as being the biggest gold diggers even though the evidence suggests that our White counterparts are far more cunning in the skill of gold digging. They encourage their daughters from a young age to aim for the men that are financially stable and has it going on! While sistas are supposed to just take whatever broken down dude that is thrown at them. I digress…
Now I am only using Lisa Raye as a example because this image of. In her case, she might be a gold digger. However, generally speaking, what defines a woman as a gold digger? I do not think that a woman who wants to date a man with a high income should automatically be cast as a gold digger. Besides, when dating most people have certain qualities that they expect out of a potential mate. A sustainable high income is one of her expectations. As long as it is not her only requirement from a potential mate, then I don’t see anything wrong with it.
I think that the term gold digger can be labeled to a woman whose only quality she desires in a man is money. If she does not have any other necessary attributes that one must have to date her besides his income then yes, she could be considered a gold digger. For instance, if she could marry a rich chimpanzee then she would. Nothing else about the man concerns her. She is only object-oriented. Only his financial income and what he can do for her matters. That is a gold digger. However, I think that wanting a man to be financially successful is no different than desiring a Christian God fearing man, or a man without kids, or a man with a job, or an intelligent man, or a man who can make you laugh. These are all separate but important attributes. These are all desires that you want in your potential mate. Why should seeking a man with a good personality be acceptable but if you want him to have good credit and a decent sized bank account then you are a gold digger. Pshh. Puleaheeze!
Especially if you yourself are a woman with a above average income level. There is nothing wrong with wanting someone who could be your equal in all things including finances. If that is what matters to you. If it does not matter to you and all you care about is what he has to offer to you emotionally then that my friend is fine as well and completely acceptable in my book. However, to deem a woman a gold digger for wanting someone financially lucrative is ludicrous.
Ladies, do not let the media, rappers, and some broke ass dudes fool you into thinking that if you want someone who wants more out of life or someone who is financially stable then you are a gold digging hoe. If anything you are someone who is being realistic about their needs and desires from the opposite sex. It is no different then a man wanting to date someone with a fat ass, big breasts, someone who gives good head or someone without kids. These are all qualities that could be seen as superficial desires but nonetheless they are attributes that some man find necessary when choosing a mate. Wanting someone who could be financially responsible for you is no different and no worse. As I stated before, these desires only become twisted when they are not accompanied by any other depth to the personality. When they overshadow any other requirement for internal maturity or growth, then that is when they become trivial and usually lead in divorce down the line. Bottom line it is acceptable to desire a man to care for you but you must desire more than that in a man for the relationship to be long lasting. Because lets face it, it is only so long that a fat wallet or a fat ass is going to hold a marriage together. If that is all that you initially required then don’t expect depth and this deep relationship down the line. There has to be something more there for it to be long lasting. Otherwise, you could go marry that chimpanzee I mentioned earlier.
[...] People always label Lisa Raye McCoy as a gold digger because she has made statements that she will not date anyone that does not have a certain higher income and lifestyle. But is she a gold digger? That term is easily thrown around for any woman in which one of her requirements is that a man is able to provide for her. Especially Black women, who have been stereotyped as being the biggest gold diggers even though the evidence suggests that our White counterparts are far more cunning in the skill of gold digging. They encourage their daughters from a young age to aim for the men that are financially stable and has it going on! While sistas are supposed to just take whatever broken down dude that is thrown at them. I digress… [Read more] [...]